Summer Solstice
by Alexis St. Claire
Summary: When Edward leaves, Bella does not jump off the cliff and Edward does not come back. It’s been three years and Bella is 21 years old. And, here’s the twist, she’s a vampire. And guess who's invited to stay at her house for a month? M in case, just a lime.
1. The Speech

_**Prologue**_

_Hey, I'm re-writing the twilight series to my liking, so, here's the deal. In the second book, when Edward leaves, Bella does not jump off the cliff and Edward does not come back. It's been three years and Bella is 21 years old. And, here's the twist, she's a vampire._

The Speech

Let me tell you all something, being a vampire is not easy. I mean, you can't go out side with out lighting up like a Christmas tree, you can't have chocolate, and, here's the kicker, you can't date anyone. Not that I cared about that part, seeing as I basically punched any guy who dared to even approach me. Oh, sorry, forgive my manners, I'm Isabella Swan. Remember me? Hi! Now I know what you're thinking, how can you be a vampire? Well, I'll tell you. Remember that girl, Victoria, and how she wanted to kill me, well, she decided it would be a worse punishment to turn me instead.

And remember that family, also vegetarian, where Tanya (the strawberry blonde who like Edward mentioned in the third book) is? Yeah, I live with them. Me and Tanya are actually quite good friends. And why was I angry? Well, we had a council meeting tonight. And guess who was gonna be there? Bingo, give the person a prize. The Cullens. And it was gonna be the first time that they were gonna see me in three years. I wonder how this would go.


	2. Explaining

So now, I sit in the new leather seats of Philip's Chrysler 300. It was very expensive and I had hooked it up to where it could book to 255 mph. I know. Me, fixing cars. But I needed a hobby and Philip had been there, so I paid attention. I stiffened as we pulled into the parking lot, this was so _not_ going to be pleasant.

I fidgeted in the chair they had seated us in for the meeting. Then I waited. Slowly the council started to announce the families here. Everyone stood up, announced their families names', and the family members. When they called out Cullen, I strained my neck to see over the count. I heard a voice, Carlisle's voice, answer, "Present, Esme, Carlisle, Alice, Jasper, Edward, Rosalie, and Emmett. No other Newborns added to the family."

We were the last ones to be announced, because our last name was Zater. I mean, really, what kind of 500 year old vampire family has Zater for a last name. The change had . . . well, changed me. A lot. My hair was no longer mahogany but a really dark brown, that was almost black and ram rod straight. My skin was iridescent and my eyes topaz. I was a little taller, maybe an inch, of my original height and sense I had been turned two days before my nineteenth I had a decent chest, surprisingly. My looks were a kind of harsh beauty (She looks like Kate Voegele, look her up on the internet: Google Images). I wasn't angelic or gorgeous, exactly, but really . . . striking, unique. Dark, and mysterious. Some might even say sexy. Yes, I just said sexy, I know. I'd be blushing right now if I could. You know, when you're a blood digesting specimen you tend to come out of your shell a little bit. But, hey, I'm not that bold as to not be embarrassed about saying 'sexy', I haven't changed _that_ much.

So yeah, I was different. Nobody would even know me if they didn't hear my name. And it was the same here. We sat right across from the Cullen and all they did, was wave at Camden and Albany. Albany was our mother, Camden had saved her from being burned as a witch in the 1690's. Camden has black hair, black eyes, and, of course, pale skin. He is 24 years old, and Albany is 27.Albany is a feisty redhead, though small, has the element of surprise in a battle. Que sigh. Alas, none of them are _special_. I, on the other hand, was not as lucky.

My special talent–.

"Zater Clan?"

Camden stood and said: "Present. Albany, Camden, Everest, Hudson, Vincent, Lexington, Nyssa, Vienna, Philip, and Tanya. One Newborn. Name: Isabella Swan."

I had been watching the Cullens out of the corner of my eye when Camden had stood, and I watched as everybody seemed to blanch, and Edward turned even paler than was probably possible for a vampire.

"Fatalities?"

"None, Sir."

There was a silence then, "Isabella Swan step forward."

I did as I was asked.

"How were you turned?"

I took a deep breath, "I had a previous relationship with a vampire and another vampire really wanted to eat me, so, my boyfriend killed him. He broke up with me after my birthday," there were sympathetic sounds all around the room. I waved my hand in the air. "Yeah, yeah, get it out now. Unfortunately, his mate did not take kindly to that and, after the usual, you know, torture and rape, she decided to change me as punishment."

"Have you seen this boyfriend since your change?"

"No."

"Is he in this room?"

I made a show of looking around the room and deliberately passed the Cullens.

"No."

"Then you may be seated." I did as I was told. I didn't look in their direction for the rest of the meeting.


	3. Songs and Bets

I almost made it. Almost. "Isabella!" I turned around to see Tyler running toward me, a pout set plainly on his face. Once he caught up with me he looked up at me, him being about 5 inches shorter than me. "You promised to sing with the band, after the meeting." I mentally winced, oh, why was I such a goody-two-shoes.

I knew I could not so much break a promise as I could kick a puppy. And Tyler looked so much like a little, lonely puppy. I sighed, there was no way I would win this fight.

"Alright," I said, sounding infinitely put upon. "I'll sing with you and your little band, but only if you take me out for ice cream after." He grinned his little boy grin. "Deal." I knew this sounded weird, but it was true. Camden figured if we could only digest blood, that he'd just make food with, like, a drop of blood in it. Cool, huh? Not.

I sighed my defeat. The Cullens had said they'd stay for the after party, where all the vegetarians got on one side of the room and the meat eaters all got on the other. It sort of reminded me of high school. Unfortunately, there only seemed to be 4 families. Who were vegetarian, I mean. I stepped behind the red velvet curtain and watched the vampires scurry about. Some used their powers and others didn't.

"Hey, Issie!" I turned at the familiar nickname to see James standing to the side of the room, working the mikes. I know, you'd think the name would make wary of him, but surprisingly, he radiates this warmth, this happiness. He was like Jacob Black. I felt an instant twinge of regret in my heart as I thought about my best friend and our short lived romance. All well, what could you do? Because, when you have a werewo,.f as a boyfriend, and get turned into a vampire, there's bound to be a couple bumps.

I walked over to James smiling in welcome. He hugged me tightly, and then turned back to the mikes.

I frowned. "I thought you played guitar?"

"Yeah, I do. It's just . . . when I get nervous my hands tend to fist and when they fist, the guitar tends to break." the sentence ended in an embarrassed chuckle, and he looked at me from beneath his long eye lashes. He would be blushing if he could, I knew.

I heard Camren, not Camden, walk out and announce our band. He said that the new edition to the band (Me, obviously). And James said, "Better get out there."

"How do I look?" I asked. He looked over me with an assessing gaze. He stepped forward. "May I?" his hands hovered above my black sweater. I nodded. "You're the expert. Remember, even though I live with fashion connoisseurs, I have no fashion sense what-so-ever."

He lifted the sweater from my body, revealing the black shimmery fabric beneath it. The fabric ended just below my breasts, showing a lot of midriff. Bending towards my black leather skirt, he easily ripped it so that it barely reached mid-thigh. I gulped. He looked at my hair that I had pulled into a severe bun. He reached up and mussed my hair, letting it fall down my back in slight waves. It went about an inch and half past the small of my back. "Very sexy." James declared. Then he frowned. _What now?, _I thought.

"Hold on." _Like I'm going anywhere. _He ran his thumbs around my black eye shadow and eye liner, smudging it so I looked like I had those weird cat eye designs on. He brought out a can of red lipstick, labeled "Vamp", and I nearly laughed aloud. "You are _so _gay!" I declared as he pocketed the lipstick (after putting it on me). He grinned, "And proud of it sister!" He said, making a dramatic pose with his hands on his hips_. _Then he looked uncomfortable. "You _do_ know I'm not gay, right?"

I rolled my eyes. "Of course, James. Nobody could love women more than you." he smiled in relief._ Your black tights and combat boots were perfect for the occasion, _he gushed_, perfect for getting your ex-boyfriend back. _I looked at him sharply before walking to the front stage. _I'm not getting him back, idiot. _James was the only one who knew the identity of the boy who had caused the rift in my heart. He was the only one who knew that Edward Cullen was the reason I was like this. Courtesy of one of my little crying fits.

"Are you ready to rock?!" I yelled. There were screams and yells erupting around me. I smiled. "This first number is called 'Stand in The Rain.' It's for all those vamps out there who ever thought of giving up."

Jason started with the guitar solo, then the piano, and then I started in. Just like we practiced.

"_**She never slows down **_

_**She doesn't know why but she knows that when **_

_**She's all alone **_

_**Feels like its all **_

_**Coming down **_

_**She won't turn around **_

_**The shadows are long and she fears if she cries **_

_**That first tear **_

_**The tears will not stop **_

_**Raining down **_

_**So stand in the rain **_

_**Stand your ground **_

_**Stand up when its all crashing down **_

_**You stand through the pain **_

_**You won't drown **_

_**And one day what's lost can be found **_

_**You stand in the rain **_

_**She won't make a sound **_

_**Alone in this fight with herself **_

_**And the fears **_

_**Whispering **_

_**If she stands **_

_**She'll fall down **_

_**She wants to be found **_

_**The only way out is through everything **_

_**She's running from **_

_**Wants to give up **_

_**And lie down **_

_**So stand in the rain **_

_**Stand your ground **_

_**Stand up when its all crashing down **_

_**You stand through the pain **_

_**You won't drown **_

_**And one day what's lost can be found **_

_**You stand in the rain **_

_**So stand in the rain **_

_**Stand your ground **_

_**Stand up when its all crashing down **_

_**You stand through the pain **_

_**You won't drown **_

_**And one day what's lost can be found **_

_**So stand in the rain **_

_**Stand your ground **_

_**Stand up when its all crashing down **_

_**You stand through the pain **_

_**You won't drown **_

_**And one day what's lost can be found **_

_**You stand in the rain."**_

I loved the Cullens' faces. They never knew I could sing like that, did they? No, I never sang around them, not even Edward. For that, I was grateful. It was the only thing I could've done to keep me from going completely insane. "Ready for another?!" As soon as the question was out it sounded like someone had announced a free lot on human flesh. Jumping and all. "O-kay, this is kind of a slower number, so please --deal with it, guys! I yelled at the section of 'boos'. It's called 'Hide'."

"_**To anyone who hides behind a smile **_

_**To anyone who holds their pain inside **_

_**To anyone who thinks they're not good enough **_

_**To anyone who feels unworthy of love **_

_**To anyone who ever closed the door **_

_**Closed their eyes and locked themselves away **_

_**Chorus**_

_**You don't have to hide **_

_**You don't have to hide anymore **_

_**You don't have to face this on your own **_

_**You don't have to hide anymore **_

_**So come out, come out, come out wherever you are **_

_**To anyone who's tryin' to cover up their scars **_

_**To anyone who's ever made a big mistake **_

_**We've all been there, so don't be ashamed **_

_**Come out, come out and join the rest of us **_

_**You've been alone for way too long **_

_**Chorus **_

_**And if you feel like no one understands **_

_**Come to the One with scars on His hands **_

_**'Cause He knows where you are, where you've been **_

_**His scars will heal you if you let Him."**_

_**chorus 2x**_

"O-kay this one's a little fatser!"

"_**I've got a secrect to tell, **_

_**A midnight confession.**_

_**I love the life that I lead,**_

_**But it's no obsession,**_

_**Because I'm waiting, anticipating**_

_**watching for your return**_

_**you'll come and get me **_

_**you know I'm ready**_

_**enjoy my stay,cuz you'll take me away**_

_**Like a thief in the night**_

_**like a runaway train**_

_**like a first class lightning fast hurricane**_

_**I'll keep my ear to the ground and my eyes to the sky**_

_**I'm ready now but somehow I know you'll take me by surprise**_

_**So I'll keep spreading the word to everybody**_

_**Until the masses have heard,about this party**_

_**Because i'm waiting anticipating**_

_**watching for your return**_

_**you'll come and get me **_

_**you know I'm ready**_

_**Enjoy my stay cuz you'll take me away **_

_**Like a thief in the night **_

_**like a runaway train **_

_**like a first class, lightning fast hurricane**_

_**I'll keep my ear to the ground and my eyes to the sky**_

_**I'm ready now but some how I know you'll take me by surprise**_

_**I R.SV.P.'d on the invitation**_

_**I sent it care of the blood**_

_**That saved me on the spot**_

_**Of the One who will come**_

_**Like a thief in the night **_

_**like a runaway train **_

_**like a first class lightning fast hurricane**_

_**I'll keep my ear to the ground and my eyes to the sky **_

_**I'm ready now but I know you'll take me by surprise."**_

" That one was called, oh, big shocker, 'By Surprise.' O-kay this one is one of my favorites. It's called 'All That I Can Do.'"

"_**I ran around the room again**_

_**I ran outside and I ran back in and I just**_

_**Couldn't get away from myself.**_

_**I don't care what tomorrow brings**_

_**I won't back down for anything**_

_**I wanna think that I was made for something else**_

_**I can't wait anymore**_

_**I'm ready to reach**_

_**So I'm closing the door**_

_**Behind me**_

_**Oh, all that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And I'll follow where You lead**_

_**Where You're leading me and**_

_**All that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And let You bring me through**_

_**It's all that I can do.**_

_**There are days I think I don't need You**_

_**There are days when I can't see the truth**_

_**I need You to save me from the lies**_

_**Because every thought that's in my head**_

_**And even when I draw my next breath**_

_**You knew it all before there was time.**_

_**I can't wait anymore**_

_**I'm ready to reach**_

_**So I'm closing the door**_

_**Behind me**_

_**Oh, all that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And I'll follow where You lead**_

_**Where You're leading me**_

_**And all that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And let You bring me through...**_

_**When the waves begin to rise**_

_**And all my hope fails...**_

_**In confidence, I'll close my eyes**_

_**Trusting You'll be there**_

_**Be there...**_

_**All that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And I'll follow where You lead**_

_**Where You're leading me**_

_**All that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And let you bring me through**_

_**Is all that I can do**_

_**All that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And I'll follow where You lead**_

_**Where You're leading me**_

_**All that I can dooo**_

_**Is hold onto You**_

_**And let You bring me through**_

_**Is all that I can dooo**_

_**Oh, let You bring me through**_

_**Is all that I can dooo**_

_**Oh, let You bring me through**_

_**Cause it's all that I can dooo.**_

_**It's all that I can do."**_

"O-kay, because you'll have been such a good audience we'll play one more song. It's called 'Pure.'"

"_**This is my brand new day starting now **_

_**I let go the things that weigh me down **_

_**And rob me of the beauty that's to be found **_

_**And life all around **_

_**Pre-Chorus: **_

_**This is my prayer without ceasing **_

_**The negative releasing **_

_**And as I rise above **_

_**My burden is easing **_

_**Chorus: **_

_**I bring the pure flow, water around **_

_**The rocks of life won't pull me down." **_

During this part of the song I started to dance. Shaking my hips and lowering my body to the floor. There were catcalls resounding from every part of the room.

"_**I bring the pure flow, drink so deep **_

_**The river of life my soul at ease **_

_**I bring the pure flow, water around **_

_**The rocks of life won't pull me down **_

_**I bring the pure flow, rising above **_

_**The storms of life to live and love **_

_**This is my brand new day in the light **_

_**Troubles rising up on the left and the right **_

_**I keep my eyes fixed on where I want to go **_

_**The rest will follow."**_

_**Pre-Chorus **_

_**Chorus **_

"_**This is my brand new day starting now **_

_**Letting go of the ways that I fall down **_

_**The old can be made new, the lost can be found **_

_**The lost will be found."**_

_**Pre-Chorus **_

_**Chorus **_

"_**My soul is at ease and I am free." **_

_**Chorus**_

"Thank you! Bye!" I waved, as I exited out the back, leaving Jason and his brothers to play on their own. I leaned against the wood wanting to hear my 2 favorite songs.

_**Let's begin with the day I met her How fast this good old boys world got better The sky got bluer, the grass got greener Just the first few seconds after I first seen her. **_

_**Like my favorite song on a new set of speakers My best old jeans and my broken sneakers A home run pitch floatin' right down the middle Sweet music made when the bow hits the fiddle.**_

_**Chorus: She's, right on the money She goes direct to my heart When it comes to loving me She's everything I need Bulls eye perfect She's, right on the money. **_

_**She's no red lights when I've over slept She's a three point jump shot thats nothin' but net A hand full of aces when the dealers done dealin' I'm forever on a roll thats how shes, got me feelin'. **_

_**Chorus: She's, right on the money She goes direct to my heart When it comes to loving me She's everything I need Bulls eye perfect She's, right on the money. **_

_**-- Instrumental -- **_

_**She's the best cook thats ever melted cheese I ain't much around the house but I aim to please There's absolutely no reason to doubt it When she says I wouldn't last ten minutes without her. **_

_**Chorus: She's, right on the money She goes direct to my heart When it comes to loving me She's everything I need Bulls eye perfect She's, right on the money. **_

_**Chorus: She's, right on the money She goes direct to my heart When it comes to loving me She's everything I need Bulls eye perfect She's, right on the money. **_

_**-- Instrumental to fade --**_

(New song)

_**Here I am alone again tonight In this old empty house It's hard to learn what you don't think you need That you can't live without Never leave the sound of the telephone But ever since you left I've been gone. **_

_**Chorus: Gone crazy Goin' out of my mind I've asked myself the reasons At least a thousand times Goin' up and down this hallway Tryin' to leave the pain behind Ever since you left I've been gone. **_

_**-- Instrumental -- **_

_**I never saw your face this many times When you were really here The things you said I never understood Are now crystal clear I never spent this much time alone But ever since you left I've been gone. **_

_**Chorus: Gone crazy Goin' out of my mind I've asked myself the reasons At least a thousand times Goin' up and down this hallway Tryin' to leave the pain Ever since you left I've been gone. **_

_**Chorus: Gone crazy Goin' out of my mind I've asked myself the reasons At least a thousand times Goin' up and down this hallway Tryin' to leave the pain behind Ever since you left me I've been gone. I've been gone. **_

_**I've been gone. I've been gone. gone, gone I've been gone. **_

_**I've been gone...**_

The music faded and I took a deep breath. Silence. Then, applause erupted from the audience and I let out the breath, smiling happily, my earlier angst forgotten. I turned and walked toward my family. Tanya was smiling happily, bouncing up and down like Alice used to. Lexi, Nys, and V all seemed to be pretty happy. No, that wasn't the word. Ecstatic was more like it. Of course, Hud, Ev, and Vence all seemed to be pouting and looking very put out. Although they would totally deny the pouting thing. Philip looked . . . tolerant. "Hey guys, what's so wonderful that the guys seem to think it's horrible?"

"Oh, Issie. It's so great! Guess what?" Tanya gushed.

I pretended to ponder the question, tapping my lower lip. "The president is staying at our house for dinner?" Tanya rolled her eyes. "Isabella, be serious, please." Uh-oh, first name, this _was_ serious shrugged. "Alright, I give up."

Tanya grinned, a flash of white against her perfect iridescent skin. "Camden invited the Cullens to stay with us! Isn't that the best?!" It was a rhetorical question but I answered anyway. "It's something."

Philip frowned. "Bells, you o-kay? You don't look so good." "No, I . . . I'm fine. I just need some fresh air. That's all." Stupid excuse, I know. What vampire needs fresh air? I turned and staggered outside the club. Outside it was peaceful and quiet. The moon shone down on the dewed grass and I ran to the truck, looking around the back of the truck. I told myself I was just changing because I didn't like staying in sweaty clothes, which was true. But I knew, somewhere in the back of my mind, that I was changing for Edward.

I traded my black rock clothes for a soft white dress, that went, just an inch or so, above my knees. I brushed through my hair letting it get soft and floaty. Then I re-did my make up, high lighting my eyes with mocha brown and dark green eyeliner. I put on a light blush, so I looked flushed, then gnawed on my lips so they were slightly plump and swollen looking, then I ended by quickly applying clear lip gloss.

I was so pathetic. I forced myself to remember back three years ago, how broken I'd been, how I'd depended on someone to keep me from killing myself. That firmed my resolve, I would not in any way or form approach Edward Cullen unless it was absolutely necessary. That or, just to make sure no one was suspicious. I'd act normal around him in public, but alone or with his family I would be a stranger to him.

Squaring my shoulders I walked back inside, however my steps faltered slightly when I saw the Cullens sitting around our table. Then I walked confidently to the table. Thankfully, their backs were toward me. "Bells!" Philip crowed patting his lap. I smiled at him and instantly walked around the table, placing myself on his lap. He slithered his arms around my waist and put his chin on my shoulder, putting our cheeks together. It was a very couple-like pose, but everyone in our family knew we were just friends.

Camden smiled at us, and turned his face back to the Cullens. "And this is our newest daughter," he said proudly. "Isabella this is Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward. They're friends of ours. One of the only vegetarian families we know." I smiled. "I know."

"We-. Wait, you know?" Camden's brow wrinkled and Albany, and my all my siblings looked at me. "Me and the Cullens knew each other previously." I said.

"Oh. O-kay, that's good then." I nodded. "They're the ones who told me about being a vegetarian and everything." It wasn't a lie exactly.

Camden grinned. "Wonderful," he declared. "I guess we have you to thank for sending us Bella." all the while through this exchange, Edward stared at me, first: shocked, second: pained, then surprised as I told everybody, easily that I already knew them.

I smiled at the little pixie in the corner. "Hello Alice."

Her expression of doubt cleared and she screamed "Bella!" and launched herself across the table. Nearly knocking me and Philip over in the process. I chuckled and rubbed a hand over her spiky hair. "I thought you of all people would've known who I was."

"Well," she said her voice still muffled since it was currently buried in my chest. "I had a vision but I didn't know it was you until they said your name. And even then, I wasn't sure." she pulled back and looked at me. "You look so different."

I grimaced wryly. "Yeah, I know. It's the hair, right?"

Before she could answer, Philip said in a squished voice, "Bella, I love you but, I can't hold the two of you."

I laughed, "Sorry, Philip." Alice and I stood up and I leaned over to brush a kiss over his forehead. Then when we had settled on the Cullens side of the table I whispered, "Such a girl."

"I heard that!" Philip declared. Alice and I giggled and she tugged on my hand and said, "We have to go shopping!" I groaned.

"I may have changed physically, Alice. But I still think shopping is hell." she pouted, "But with your new figure, you'll have to but clothes that work for you."

I nodded. "Yes, but," I looked at Nys, V, Lexi, and Tan. "That's their job. If you want to go shopping for me, you have to go with them."

"O-kay," she said eagerly, and all the girls went off discussing my new look. Once they were gone, the guys grinned. "You are so in trouble Bells. Those 5 are gonna dress you up to look like a hooker," Philip said. Everybody agreed. The Cullens were silent, watching the exchange with interest. I shook my head with mock indignation. "Do you have no faith in your wives?" I demanded.

All of them looked at each other then looked at me. "Naw!" they all said in unison. I paused, and scowled at them until they all were quiet, looking nervously from one to another. Then I laughed. "Neither do I."

"Hey, Bells. I bet you 50 bucks that you can't get that guy to give you his # within 5 minutes." Everest dared pointing at a blonde guy sitting at the bar.

I shook my head. "No deal. Higher stakes."

"Alright, you win, I have to . . ." he frowned in concentration.

I grinned evilly. "You have to put on one of my mini skirts and tank tops then go up on stage and sing 'I Feel Pretty.'" His eyes bulged and Emmett burst out his booming life. Everest gulped. "Fine but if I win, then you have to make out with Tanya for three minutes." "Pshaw, you're on." Reaching out I downed the Bloody Marie and gave my shoulders a shake, then I smiled and said, "Start warming up those vocal cords Ev."

I stood up and sashayed over to the bar. I sat down next to blondie and said, "Bloody Marie," to the bartender, then I turned to the guy and asked, "Excuse me, do you know the time?"

He looked at me then at his watch, "12:47 pm."

"Oh." I said sounding forlorn. I sighed and laid my head on my wrist. The man frowned, noticing my sadness. "Are . . . you o-kay?"

"Oh, yeah I'm fine. I was expecting someone, and I guess . . . I guess he changed his mind."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

I laughed weakly. "No. Don't be. It just figures, doesn't it? I mean, you meet someone really nice and it turns out they were just playing you." The man looked sympathetic. "Yeah, I know what you mean. By the way I'm Stephen." He stuck out his hand. And what a nice hand it was. Big and strong, with callouses. I shook it. "Isabella."

"Isabella," he said rolling it around in his mouth as if he liked the sound. "That's a beautiful name. And it fits its owner." He looked down at the bar as he said this and he looked so sweet, that I said thank you, and laid my hand on his arm.

"I have to go now, but . . . would you like to call me sometime?" he nodded and said eagerly, "Sure." we exchanged #'s and I walked back happily to the table and put his # on the table. I grinned. "Go pretty yourself up Everest." he paled and said I have to go to the bathroom and quickly scurried toward the back of the bar. I chuckled. "I bet he's going to go tell Lexi."

I sat down and pocketed the number. Edward frowned, "You aren't going to really call that guy are you?" I stilled, it was the first thing he said all night. Then I shrugged. "Why not? He seemed like a nice enough guy." he made a noise that sounded like a choking sound than stood and strode away. I sat down crossing my arms.

"What's his problem Vince demanded. I didn't say anything and just watched hid retreating figure. I glanced worriedly at Esme and said, "I'll go after him. This was not in my plan to stay unattached.


	4. Unsaid Feelings

Edward

Pain seemed throb through my body. She'd changed so much, my Bella. _But she isn't your Bella anymore, _a voice inside me said. I sighed. I knew this. Oh, did I know this. Three years I had yearned for her. Her smile, her warmth, her eyes; so inviting and always sparkling with life. The scarlet blush that rose to her skin when she was embarrassed, and her mahogany hair. It was all gone.

The innocence had left her, her heart; beat no longer. And her smile was now one of bitter cynicism, no longer the warm invitation, or shy welcome it had once been. The one thing that remained was her voice. That voice I couldn't seem to remember even in my strongest day dreams now echoed through her throat when she talked.

But somehow, even with all these changes, she still looked like Bella. That unique look, that unseen pull that emanated from her.

And when she sang, it was like hearing an angel. When she'd sang 'Hide' it'd felt like when we'd been in the car three years ago, when she'd told me she didn't care what I was. I now saw how she was so helpful with the newborns, despite never having killed a single human. (That's what they meant when they said 'no fatalities'.) She exuded this warmth and generosity that drew people towards her. Despite her rough and tumble attitude.

I was so engrossed with my thoughts that I did not notice the shadow behind me.

I felt a cool hand on my shoulder and whipped around to see, none other than the occupant of my thoughts standing before, so sweetly uncertain. "You . . . okay?" she asked hesitantly.

I shrugged my shoulders turning back to the view of the moon off the balcony. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, . . . I don't know. When you left Esme looked worried so I came to check on you."

"Is that the only reason you came to see me?" I demanded, whirling around and staring down at her. Thanks to her taller figure, if I just angled my head the slightest bit I could probably kiss her. Her pupils dilated and I knew she noticed too.

"Y . . . yes."

I stepped closer, our chests touched, and whispered; "I think you're lying."

Her eyes widened slightly. "I . . . I'm not."

Isabella

Damn him! Why was he making this so hard? I wanted so badly to be taken in his arms, and to kiss him. Damn him!

"You're invading my personal space," I said and took a huge step back. "Look, Edward. We may not be the best friends but I'd like to at least be civil towards each other when we're around my family."

Edward closed his eyes tightly. "Okay." The one word seemed to be dragged from his mouth.

I frowned at his obvious distress. "Hey," I reached out a hand and laid it on his chest. "You okay?"

Edward

Was I okay? Was I okay?! No, I was not okay. The love of my life was standing before me asking that we at least be civil towards each other in public.

But when I felt her hand resting, like a shy butterfly, against my once beating heart I calmed instantly. Just like when she was human. And I realized, I didn't care if we couldn't be romantic, I was just exhilarated to see her this time. Knowing I would be able to see her face very morning for three weeks made me want to jump up and down.

Getting to talk to her, no matter the subject, satisfied me. So I locked away my yearning and smiled at her, taking her hand within mine. "Let's go back to the others, I bet they're waiting for us."

She frowned down at our intertwined hands but did not protest as we walked back to our tabled. Who knows we maybe good friends by the time our stay is done.


	5. Perfection

As we made our way back to the table, everyone voted on going home. So we all paired up into the cars and made our way back to the mansion. The old Victorian house stood proudly up from the earth surrounding it.

Everyone bustled, and yelled, all talking about all they wanted to do. The noise was deafening. I sighed, leaning my head against the cool window. The moon was now hid behind a bunch of clouds, blocking the light so it was eerily dark.

I could hear my sisters talking about the Cullens.

"I liked the big one." Vienna said. "All those muscles. Mmmmhhh." she made a dreamy sound. I laughed quietly, she was lucky Vince was in the other car with Camden, Albany, James . . . Yes, James lived with us. Along with Everest and Hudson. I felt a twinge of sympathy for Philip. All alone in this car, with a bunch of tittering females.

"What about the Blonde? He was such a hunk." That was Nyssa.

Lexi laughed. "Which one? I liked the one who was with the pixie."

Tanya made a mewing noise. "I liked Edward. With the bronze hair and the dark eyes, and that lost look."

I heard a distinct growl from the front seat.

Tanya smiled, and reached into the front seat, rubbing her hands through Philips hair. "Don't worry, baby. I'm only window shopping." They'd only been together recently and she'd had a problem with our relationship, you know, sitting in each others laps, that kind of thing. So we aren't aloud to do that in front of her. She's working on it, and I assured her I would never be 'the other woman' because I had been cheated on before and I could never do that to anyone.

"Oh, I don't know. I think maybe he might be a little taken with another girl."

My ears perked but I refused to turn around.

"Yeah," Tanya agreed. And since our dear Bella refused to look around, she did not see the significant glances the girls tossed her way.

_**Later . . . **_

We walked into the old house. The Cullens weren't far behind us. I walked quickly through the empty hallways, up the staircase and ran to the end of the corridor. I slipped into my room and soundlessly closed the door.

I looked around my room, seeing the paintings and drawings on the walls. Some were of wolves, some of angels, some of sunsets, some of waterfalls, some of stars, some of meadows, some of flowers, some of my family, some of Vince in the sun, some of Philip in the sun and so on and so forth. Some were anguished, some sad, some happy, and some violent. There was one where it was a wedding filled with smiles, and then there was me bound in chains screaming in agony and nobody seemed to notice, not one of my happier periods. There were few happy paintings on my wall, for I had only started painting those recently. But there was one picture that stood out from the rest of them. One picture that was perfect, in it's sadness, in it's happiness, in it's beauty.

It was the one picture I had drawn from memory. The one thing I had done that was against everything I did and planned to do. It was a painting of Edward. Of what he'd been like in the meadow. Sparkling and happy, but still with a twist of melancholy in his smile.

And, to say the least, it was my favorite. Walking over to the wall, I quickly pulled it off the wall and slid it under my bed. None of my family had seen it, because none of them had been allowed to come this far into my paintings, I'd always shooed them away or distracted them, but I knew my sisters would want to show them every room.

And I was right. Not two minutes than that, when I walked down the stairs, I heard Tanya insist, "Oh, you guys have to see our rooms. They're all beautiful! And then we'll bring you to your own. Oh! Just leave your luggage there."

I exhaled. Whew. Turning back around I walked back to my room and showered. I put on my white silk night gown, and no, I was not wearing it for Edward, and **( Picture on my profile, click on Author, along with guitar and others.)** picked up my guitar, sitting on my bed. Strumming the cords I started to softly sing a song.

Mmm...

I've never been the kind that you call lucky  
Always stumblin' around in circles  
but I must've stumbled into something  
Look at me, am I really alone with you?

I wake up feeling like my life's worth livin'  
Can't recall when I last felt that way  
Guess it must be all this love you're givin'  
Never knew, never knew  
it could be like this...  
But I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks  
Some hearts have the stars on their side  
Some hearts, they just have it so easy  
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes

Some hearts just get lucky, lucky sometimes...

Now who'd have thought someone like you could love me?  
You're the last thing my heart expected  
Who'd have thought I'd ever find somebody  
Someone who, someone who... makes me feel like this...  
Well, I guess

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks  
Some hearts have the stars on their side  
Some hearts, they just have it so easy  
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes  
Some hearts just get lucky  
Sometimes...

Ooh...

Even hearts like mine  
Get lucky, lucky sometimes!

Even hearts like mine!

Ohhhhhhh! Oh, oh!

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks  
Some hearts have the stars on their side  
Some hearts, they just have it so easy  
Some hearts just get lucky  
Sometimes

Some hearts, they just get all the right breaks  
Some hearts have the stars on their side  
Some hearts, they just have it so easy  
Some hearts just get lucky sometimes

Some hearts just get lucky  
Sometimes!

Sometimes!

Ooh...

I could hear the floor boards creeping as Everybody went into Vince's room, right next to me.

There's some things that I regret,  
Some words I wish had gone unsaid,  
Some starts, That had some bitter endings,  
Been some bad times I've been through,  
Damage I cannot undo,  
Some things,  
I wish I could do all all over again,  
But it don't really matter,  
Life gets that much harder,  
It makes you that much stronger,  
Oh, some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were,  
Lessons learned.

CHORUS:  
And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,  
Every change, life has thrown me,  
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,  
I'm grateful, for every scar,  
Some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were lessons learned.

There's mistakes that I have made,  
Some chances I just threw away,  
Some roads,  
I never should've taken,  
Been some signs I didn't see,  
Hearts that I hurt needlessly,  
Some wounds,  
That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,  
But it don't make no difference,  
The past can't be rewritten,  
You get the life you're given,  
Oh, some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were,  
Lessons learned.  
CHORUS:  
And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,  
Every change, life has thrown me,  
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,  
I'm grateful, for every scar,  
Some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were lessons learned.

And all the things that break you,  
All the things that make you strong,  
You can't change the past,  
Cause it's gone,  
And you just gotta move on,  
Because it's all,  
Lessons learned.

CHORUS:  
From every tear that had to fall from my eyes,  
From everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,  
From every change, life has thrown me,  
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,  
I'm grateful, for every scar,  
Some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were lessons learned,  
Oh, some pages turned,  
Some bridges burned,  
But there were lessons learned,  
Lessons learned.

The door opened, and Tanya poked her head in. I smiled and mouthed 'come in'. Then I continued to play. I heard her say: "And this is Issie's room."

I was sitting on my doorstep,  
I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,But I knew I had to do it,  
And he wouldn't understand,  
So hard to see myself without him,  
I felt a piece of my heart break,  
But when you're standing at a crossroad,  
There's a choice you gotta make.

Chorus:  
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,  
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,  
And let go of some things I've loved,  
To get to the other side,  
I guess it's gonna break me down,  
Like falling when you try to fly,  
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,  
Starts with goodbye.

I know there's a blue horizon,  
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,  
Getting there means leaving things behind,  
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.

Chorus:  
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,  
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,  
And let go of some things I've loved,  
To get to the other side,  
I guess it's gonna break me down,  
Like falling when you try to fly,  
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,  
Starts with goodbye.

Time heals,  
The wounds that you feel,  
Somehow, right now.

Chorus:  
I guess it's gonna have to hurt,  
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,And let go of some things I've loved,  
To get to the other side,  
I guess it's gonna break me down,  
Like falling when you try to fly,  
It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,  
Starts with goodbye,  
I guess I'm gonna have to cry,  
And let go of some things I've loved,  
To get to the other side,  
Starts with goodbye,  
The only way you try to find,  
Moving on with the rest of your life,  
Starts with goodbye,  
Na, na, na, na, na, na, na.

The Cullens looked around my room, while Tanya chattered on about my paintings. And how when, I'd first come here I refused to talk, and I painted. She pointed out one of my oldest paintings. It was a fallen angel, she'd pulled her legs into her chest, and laid her head to the side, as if looking straight st us, with silent tears trailing down her pale cheeks. It was black and white, but the only color were her tears. They were blood red.

Then Tanya continued and explained, how further along in my stay my paintings got less and less darker and more and more happier. Then she told about when I had first talked and how everyone had practically fainted. She talked about my first sentence, how I'd looked at Philip and said, "I think Tanya likes you."

That seemed to make everyone laugh.

Edward

When we entered Bella's room I nearly gasped. The walls were covered with paintings. Dark paintings, sad paintings, and scary paintings. Though near the end of the wall they got lighter, but still. When Tanya pointed out the crying angel I wanted to cry out in anguish. But then she moved on and showed us the happier paintings and explained how the paintings got happier when Bella, or Issie, got happier. And all the while, Bella sat on her bed strumming her guitar and singing.

God, she was beautiful. I wanted to run over and bury my head in the crook of her shoulder. But I restrained myself. Barely. I liked her paintings though, only the happy ones. Especially the one where a girl, identical to Bella, was in the ocean. And the water sprayed up onto her, creating a dress out of the water to cover her, as she rode a killer whale.

The smile on her face was beautiful and I stopped breathing at the sight. Her head was being ripped at by the wind and she was dipping one hand into the water, the other rubbing the animal that carried her, she was surrounded by a series of islands and the sun shone down bright, making her skin glitter and sparkle.

She was perfection.


	6. Whispers In The Night

I blanched as I realized what had awoken me from my slumber; a thunder storm.

I thrashed on my bed, wiggling uselessly. I jumped and squeaked loudly in protest as a loud thundering filled the air. This was the only down fall to being on the top floor. I'd never been in this big a storm, not even in Forks.

That's right, I can sleep; one of my many talents. You see, I could do many things other vampires could do; my emotions seemed to control things. Like, objects around me or the weather for example. And my hair, it floated around my head when I got angry. Oh, and my eyes glowed orange too, but enough about that.

Well, it was clear I wouldn't get any sleep tonight. Climbing out of bed, I walked towards the stairs but stopped short as I heard Edward's velvety voice. "Emmett, I just don't know what to do. She's so cold toward me, as if I don't exist, as if I'm not even in the room." I peered around the corner of the wall, looking down into the entryway below. The dining room light shone brightly at the four figures standing there. One was seated, the rest standing.

"Well, Edward," Carlisle now. "Think of it from her point of view. You break her heart and then leave without hesitation, then, all of a sudden, you're back in her life. If she feels now how she felt then, just think about how much you could be hurting her right now. Give her time."

"Ugh, I know, I know. But . . . I just want to hold her again." His head fell into his upturned hands.

"Give her time," Carlisle repeated.

"She's confused and wary. She doesn't want to be hurt gain." Jasper said.

"I loved her!" Edward suddenly roared. He stood up so abruptly that the chair he sat in fell to the floor. "I love her."

Carlisle nodded sympathetically. "I know, but Edward, she's not ready. She's not ready for you."

He nodded. "I'll give her as much time as I can, but the truth is, I don't know how much longer I'll be able to hold on before I kiss her senseless." He said it, his expression grim. Emmett chuckled quietly and said, "Didn't know you were such a player, brother."

I pressed back up against the wall, my breathing irregular despite being undead. Could he really love me? Or was it just lust, because of my change?


	7. Into The Storm

_Eeeeeeeeeeccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!_

_Okay, stop that train in it's tracks. I'm eavesdropping, eavesdropping!! I feel like a student in the 'How To Be An Evil, Bitch-y Ex-Girlfriend 101.' I'm eavesdropping on a personal conversation, how bad am I? oh, and if that isn't bad enough, the person I'm eavesdropping is my ex-boyfriend! Of three years!_

_What did it matter that he supposedly loved me or lusted after me or whatever?! It didn't matter to me what-so-ever. I'll pretend this never happened and things will go back to the way they were supposed to be, the way they were before. But, oh, his voice seemed wto echo in my head. And I could almost hear the agony . . . NO!! Bad Bella, bad Bella!! it didn't matter, or so I said, or thought, really._

_But I knew the in the one dark corner, the tiny corner I refused to acknowledge, that if he were to get down on his knees and beg me for forgiveness and my love, I knew I would give it to him, no reservation. Damn!_

_**Love bites.**_

Carrying out what I had planned to do, I walked down the cold staircase briskly. Unemotionally, I heard nothing, saw nothing, I was oblivious, as always. Passing the Cullen -males I strode toward the old English door, and stepped out into the storm. I marveled at the potency of the weather. Much like the emotions swelling inside me.

Edward

I blanched then smacked my forehead with the palm of my hand. Lovely. I _had _to have this conversation at the foot of the stairs. Not to mention, this conversation had to include my dear big bear of a brother, Emmett. _Okay, calm down, m aybe she didn't hear anything._

_Yeah, and she loves to shop with Alice._

_Shut up._

_Hey, maybe this is a good thing. Now she knows how you feel about her._

_Yeah, and now she'll be running for the hills by the time I'm finally alone with her to explain._

I sighed, my shoulders slumped, might as well, go and face the examination now. I stalked through the door, and stopped dead when I saw her azul wrap around floating in the air, caught on an out stretched twig. Instead of Bella's retreating back I was faced with her scent. I exhaled sharply, the little idiot, didn't she know thatIreland's storms could be very violent this time of year.

Cursing, I immediately followed through the thick brush, after my love.


	8. Reverent Kisses

Bella

I stood on the jutting edge of the cliff, the water spraying up onto me. Lime tiny cold kisses. I sighed. This was when my powers were most active. They seemed to bubble and fizz inside me, trying to break free. (As I explained to ya'll, Bella's emotions affected nature, and un-living objects, that were all around her.

I distinctly heard a twig snapped behind me and turned around to see Edward fighting through the brush. I laughed at the sight. Twigs stuck to him every way possible, his hair, his shirt, even his arms. My laugh caught his attention and I could see him call out to me, but I couldn't hear him and promptly turned around, presenting him with my back. Using my influence I immediately calmed the sea around us. I turned back around, "What? I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you." He strode across the cliff and stopped in front of me, his frame shaking.

"I said, 'what the hell do you think you're doing out here?!'"

I smiled serenely at him and saw his eyes widen briefly. "Edward," I grabbed his hand and turned him to look out with me. "Isn't it beautiful?"

He was silent as he stared broodingly at the storm clouds. I nudged him. "Come on; don't tell me you don't see it." Still he was silent.

"Don't tell me you don't see the beauty, the wildness. It's beautiful." I released the hold I had on the ocean and it once again started to splash on us.

I laughed in delight, twirling round and round. Two steal hands clamped on my waist and I saw a fire burning in Edward's topaz eyes. Acting on instinct I threw my arms around his neck, pressing my body against the length of his. He gasped. I leaned forward and caught his lower lip between my teeth to nip at. He moaned, and I took the advantage of his open mouth to kiss him. My icy tongue and we both moaned, his arms wrapped around me tight, stroking my back. He clutched at my soaked dress, groaning in frustration when the material refused to stay in his hands.

I jumped up wrapping my legs around his waist, and his hands clamped under my thighs, holding me even closer.

Edward

The rain slicked over our bodies, melding them together. My tongue dueled hers, and carnal sounds of longing emitted from my throat and I knew then I wouldn't be able to stop, that I'd have to be dragged off her to halt this exquisite torture.

_**HELP ME!! **__One question for the nice readers who actually read this. Should I add some lemon-y goodness in here? Then I'd have to change the rating._


	9. Hot Kisses

Bella

I kissed Edward as if I was starved for the taste of him. Edward stumbled slightly and we fell to the ground, me on top and Edward on bottom. Edward groaned at the contact of our bodies, and held me even tighter so that if I were human I would have surely been crushed. Lifting up my body on my elbows I peered at Edward and felt a surge of triumph at the sight.

His head was tilted back slightly, his lips parted, and he panted for breath he didn't need. He opened his eyes and looked at me quizzically. I smiled slowly at him, "Now do you see it?" I asked in a sultry voice.

He smiled slightly and then gulped loudly. "Yeah," he panted out. "Please . . ."

"Please, what?"

"Kiss me." He breathed and I complied, leaning all my weight down on him. Edward brought up his hands to cup the backs of my thighs and started to move in a slight undulating movement, causing me to groan and squirm against him. I could feel him pressing against my pussy and pushed harder against him, making him groan and arch his hips against me.

Rain pelted my back in little pieces of ice and shivered though it was not from the cold. Little electric bolts seemed to zing through me each time a drop of water slapped against me and I brought up all my power to the surface, all I was feeling, and pushed it towards Edward, wanting him to feel an ounce of what I felt. Oh god, I loved this man. And in this moment there was no broken hearts, no break ups, there was only man and woman. Two bodies that moved together in a rhythm to match the long dead heart beats that seemed to restart with the force of the warmth.

Liquid fire pooled between my legs, making me clench my muscles in need. Edward abruptly switched our positions, his weight pressing me into the damp soft grass. He moved his thigh between my legs and brought up his face up to watch me. He pushed his leg against me until I straddled his knee and started to rock back and forth, trying to douse the fire that had been started. I moaned and tried to bring Edward's head down towards my lips, wanting his mouth on mine. He complied but stopped an inch away and whispered against my swollen lips, "Do you like this?"

I moaned in answer, trying to my hips and discovered he had trapped them successfully with his two legs. He held me firmly and tipped my head back with his thumb under my chin. "Can I do this?' he breathed before dipping his head and tracing his tongue just along my collar bone. I moaned and brought my arms up trying to pull him down once again.

He shook his head and in one startling move, he pinned my hands to the ground, and looked me straight in the eyes. His seemed to have caught fire and turned to molten metal, they seemed to move with emotion. "I want to know what you want." He said, pulsing his hips slightly against my mound. I moaned breathlessly.

He moved his lips softly up my neck and then to the side to flirt with my ear. "Tell me." He demanded, and nipped my earlobe making my breath catch, then soothed the tiny wound with his tongue. My breath stuttered out.

"I want you to . . . m-move!" I practically shouted and he smiled that crooked smile of his. And he whispered enticingly, "How? What do you want? This?" he said and rocked his hips against me, his hard length hitting me exactly where I needed him.

"Yes, yes. Oh, please." I begged, arching my mouth to receive his kiss. Edward's smile slowly disappeared and his eyes burned brighter than ever. He pushed his tongue into my mouth and I groaned. Yes, yes, this was exactly what I needed.

Edward

My god, her taste was heady, like a fine wine. I could easily get drunk on. At first I had to keep reminding myself that she wasn't as breakable as she used to be, but old habits died hard. But then she moaned. The tiniest sound and yet it seemed to unleash the beast in me. The one who had lain by her side at night yearning to take her in his arms and act out all the fantasies he'd ever dreamt of.

I pushed against her, and she groaned loud and long. I rubbed against her, pleasure spearing through me with every noise and movement she made. Then suddenly, she bucked up and rolled us over, effectively pinning me down. My eyes widened and she giggled at my expression. I looked up at her and for the first time saw a glowing happiness in her expression, and knowing I was the cause made my heart soar. I was so happy, she made me so happy, and I could only hope that what was about to happen would convince her of my love.

She stared at me for the longest time, her breath heaving in and out, causing her soft breast to push against my chest. Her scent was now even stronger because of the rain and it seemed to surround me, making my head spin in delirium. Her lips were swollen and now, rose red, her eyes darken to caramel a tad lighter than the brown it had been when she was human. Her cheeks were flushed lightly from our passionate kisses, (Their faces rubbed together) and her hair lay around her in ebony curls.

She reached out a delicate hand and brushed the hair off my forehead, and I sighed at her touch, leaning up for another kind of kiss. A softer kiss. One that I hoped would tell her of my love.

_**Please review! This is my first lemon-y thing. Give me tips if I need to do more or less of something.**_


	10. A Sweeter Kiss

Bella

I sighed into this kiss and the urgency of the moment seemed to pass. Leaving in it's wake, the scrambled feelings and thoughts but right now, before all those things that seemed to push against me, I wanted this kiss. This kiss that seemed to tell me of a love that had bee there 3 years before he had ripped my heart into pieces. His lips were soft as cashmere against mine, no longer hard and demanding but those of the old Edward who would hold me at night and would whisper words of love to me. So many nights I had missed his sweet breath against my neck, his velvety voice singing me to sleep, and on more than one occasion I had awoken reaching out for him to only find an empty side on the bedside.

His hands were no longer adventurous but now cradled me as if I were something precious, as if I were something to fight for. I pulled my lips away from his and lay my head on his shoulder sighing in total and complete bliss. "What are we doing Edward?" I asked.

He stroked my hair lightly and lay his head against mine. "That's easy, I'm loving the woman I love."

the terrible edge to cry hit me, and I pulled away sharply turning my head away. "Don't say that Edward. Don't tell me that it's just plain cruel to mess with me like that."

He grabbed my wrist and turned me around to face him, using his thumb under my chin and I at once cursed my melted bones from that heated kiss because I still didn't have the strength to pull away from him.

His frown was ferocious, and . . . there was a glimmer in his eyes I had never seen before. It looked something an awful like . . . anger?

"Isabella Marie Swan, do you really think that I would play this kind of joke on you? Do you?!"

His eyes blazed now with anger instead of passion. I whimpered out a 'no'.

He didn't seem to hear. He shook me, his hands tight on my shoulders. "You silly wonderful, beautiful, idiot, girl. Don't you know love when you see it?"

I had been holding myself rigid in his arms and now went limp at the sound of the L word. "Love?" I asked weakly.

He bobbed his head angrily. "Yes, love. And you know what? It's horrible. With you I haven't known if I was up or down. You've rung my bells worse than any pissed off tiger. Bella," he said, his anger suddenly replaced with a soul deep sorrow that made a hard tug on my heart.

"Don't you know I love you? Most ardently. I thought I would die from the agony, and I think I did a little. I left a vital thing with you that day, do you know what it was?"

I shook my head. And his eyes seemed to tighten as of in pain. "I left you my heart, Bella. I basically curled into a ball after you left me, I wouldn't eat, wouldn't even come out of my room. With out you in my life there was no sun, no laughter, no happy ending to my story. I very nearly came to your window each night, and I had to battle with myself not to run over and beg you to take me back. But I didn't, because I thought it was best for you. "

I interrupted him. "How could you have thought that _you leaving me_ would be best for me?"

"You would have always's been in danger with me, . Your life would have been in jeopardy with me. And, Bella, if I had hurt you . . ." he looked at me and I could see the terror, the stark fear in his eyes.

"If I had ever hurt you, I don't think I could have handled it." To tell you the truth, it was the eyes that did it, because one moment I was sitting there trying to resist him, and the next I was cradling him to my chest, his head settled in the hollow of my throat and we were rocking, slowly, from side to side.

Edward

When she'd said she thought I had been messing with her, tricking her, I had been angry at first with her. And then I'd realized that I really should be mad at myself, after all I was the reason she was so wary. _I_ was the reason she was so sad. And I hated myself for it. But when she'd pulled me into her arms, comforting _me_. I had felt complete in a way I hadn't felt in years. Bella, _my Bella, _was here, holding me. But, did she love me?

But that wasn't the big question here, the big question here was: Could she forgive me? A sudden fear tightened my throat. What if she couldn't forgive me? What if she rejected me? For if she did, I would cease to exist. I would surely die.

I pulled back and looked up at her, and nearly fell to my knees at the love I saw shining there. But I needed the words. Rising to my knees, I placed her on my lap and held her beautiful face in my hands. I kissed her cheeks, her eyes, her nose, her lips, and her forehead.

"Isabella Swan, I love you with all my heart. It is yours and always has been, ever since you first tripped into the horrible cafeteria. Please, please, please, say you love me too?"

She bit her lip a second before kissing me so very sweetly on the lips.

"Of course I love you, Edward Cullen. I've always loved you. Ever since you first smiled that crooked smile of yours, I've been head over heels in love." I closed my eyes and held her tightly against me, wanting to never let go. This beautiful creature was here with me, and she loved me, as far as she was concerned, I was never letting go.


	11. Reassurances

_**Ha, you really didn't think I'd let innocent little Bella lose the big V on a cliff, did you? Ya'll have some dirty minds. Anyway thank you for all the reviews, ya'll are amazing.**_

Bella

Edward held me for a long time after that. He told me that it actually hurt him to have to let go of me, even for a second, so I told him not to. He said that after 3 years of never seen my face he wanted to memorize every line, every curve, every detail he could pick up. And this made me uneasy.

"You do know, Edward, that I'm not exactly . . . the same as I was before. I'm not as soft, I don't look the same at all-."

He silenced my worries with a kiss.

"Bella, you maybe different on the outside, but you're the same person inside as you were before, you're just a little . . . less naive. And," he said dipping his head and nuzzling my neck affectionately. "I must say, " he licked and nibbled on my collarbone. "There are some definite advantages." He kissed my shoulder.

"L-like what?"

"Mmm. Like . . . this." He said and nudged the strap of my nightgown down so he could brush his mouth against the side of my barely covered breast. After a few moments of teasing me with almost touches he lifted his head and looked up at me, grinning triumphantly.

"But, what about my smell?"

"Mmm." he nodded, closing his eyes and inclining his head toward my neck again, inhaling deeply. "It's still just as intoxicating as it was when you were human," he winced at the word, "but it does not invoke the thirst so I can lay hear and sniff you all day." A mischievous twinkle entered his eyes and he rolled me over pining me to the ground. He sniffed exaggeratedly, snuffling my neck and shoulders while I laughed and giggled and twisted from the tickling sensation.

He finally gave me time to stop laughing, drawing in unnecessary breaths. "We have to ga back some time, you know." he sighed tragically and stood up gracefully, extending his hand toward me. I took it.

"Hey, it stopped raining, and the sun's out." he said, surprise laced in his tone. "How did that happen? No, wait, when did that happen?" I decided to answer the latter first.

"When we were other wise occupied," I said as seductively as I could, wrapping my arms around his neck and giving him a passionate kiss. When I pulled back Edward had this dazed expression on his face and I could have jumped and squealed like a little girl for the fact that I could make him so oblivious to everything around him.

"And," I said casually, "I did."

He frowned. "You did what?"

"Made the sun come out."

"What?" he asked, the perfect picture astonishment on his face.

"The weather changes with my emotions."

He looked at the sun for a second and then a huge smile broke through on his face. "So, this means you're really happy, right?"

I nodded. "Yep." I then took a minute to study him, watching his skin glitter and sparkle. "You're kind of beautiful, you know." he smiled slightly at my comment. "Not as beautiful as you, though."

Then he laughed. I frowned. "What?"

He shook his head. "Just something I remember Rosalie thinking."

"What? What was it?"

He shook his head again, his hair flopping. "Just something about you being prettier than she expected and not wanting to have any competition."

I laughed quietly. "She hasn't changed much, has she?"

"No."

Then there was yelling in the distance, bouncing, and echoing off the cliffs.

I sighed. Into the monsters cave.


	12. Meeting The Family Again

We walked toward the house in silence, hands linked, and then Edward tugged me to a stop in the middle of the trail. I frowned up at him in confusion. "What?"

"M-may I, may I, hold you?" he asked, nervously switching from foot to foot. I laughed and said: "Edward, you have held me."

He shook his head. "That wasn't the same I was too busy with . . . uh . . . with your . . . uh. It just wasn't the same. _Please."_ The please got me. It tugged at my heart and I looked into his pleading eyes, seeing a need there, a need I wanted to fill.

I stepped toward him, an answer in my eyes and he hesitantly wrapped his arms around my waist, always so cautious.

I grinned, thinking I'd give him a little push, and wrapped my arms around his back, squeezing him lightly. He let out a shuddery breath and slowly clasped me to him. He let out a choked sound, somewhere between a whimper and a sob. His chest shook under me, and he buried his face in my neck, inhaling deeply.

"Oh, god. Oh, god. Oh, god." He murmured, lifting me up off the ground and crushing me to him. I smiled, the urge to weep over whelming me. Edward had always been so careful and this was the first time, not counting our make out session on the cliff, that he would be able to hold me as a human. That he would be able to hold me exactly as he wanted to with out hurting me.

He set me down but didn't let go of me. Cradling my face in his hands, he brushed tiny butterfly kisses over my face. Then he stopped leaning his forehead against mine. "I love you."

I smiled. "Ditto."

Tugging on his wrist I led him, though however reluctant he was, to the house. He was once again cautious. "Why are you so nervous, my family are all in their rooms, and you've already made an impression on them. Well, on my sisters anyway." He grimaced wryly.

"Yeah, but I haven't met them as your 'boyfriend' yet."

I shook my head. "It seems we've switched bodies Mr. Cullen. You're worried about meeting the family and I'm trying to reassure you." He pouted adorably, pushing out his lower lip and wrinkling his forehead, and I couldn't help standing on my tiptoes and kissing that frown away, but when he tried to reach my lips I pulled back with a slinky smile.

"Uh-uh-uuuhhhh. Can't have that." he groaned and I smiled even more.

We stopped at the front of the house and I looked at Edward. "Ready?"

"No." I laughed and shook my head opening the door any way.

As usual my family was not about. "See? Like I said, they're in their rooms."

Edward smiled in relief and we walked up the stair case and to my room. We stopped outside the door. "Do . . . um . . . do you want to come in?" I asked, fidgeting with my hands. Edward's stronger hand covered then and when I looked up, his face was serious.

"Only if you want me to." I nodded slowly. I would want him for the rest of eternity.

He slipped off his shoes at the door, and then crawled on the big bed. I followed suit and just laid my head on his chest. And that's how we stayed. Until the door opened.

"Hey, Issie, I was just-. Holy crap. Sorry!" Phil turned around and strode out of the room, shutting the door behind him. I laughed at Edward's face, it was positively terrified as we heard the resounding bellow of 'BELLA and EDWARD!' from all the corners of the house.


	13. Taking It All In

Bella

I smiled teasingly at Edward.

"You didn't really think we would be able to hide this from them for very long, did you?"

He shrugged and gave me a chagrined smile. "I hoped."

I shook my head in amusement. "Edward. We live with an Empath and a Physic. How could you possibly think we would keep this on the down low?"

"I didn't. I just hoped we would have some time alone before-."

The door crashed open and Emmett bounded through with a grin the size of Montana on his face. "Bella!"

He scooped off the bed and into his arms, squeezing me as hard as he could. Next thing I knew, I was being passed around the Cullen's, being held just as tightly as Emmett had been. I was shocked when even Rosalie grasped me tightly.

Finally they set me on my feet, only to be claimed once again by Edward.

"So, are you guys back together?" Emmett asked eagerly, but before Edward could answer, Alice slapped him on the head. "Of course they're back together, you dumbo! Look at them!"

I laughed, having missed my pixie-like friend.

"Alright, alright, everybody. I would think these two would like some time alone." Carlisle said in his calm tone. Mumbling, disgruntled, all of them cleared out, though Esme stopped to look at me happily one last time before she exited.

We were silent for seconds before we both started laughing so hard that we both fell on our sides, on the bed. Once I stopped laughing I looked up to see Edward staring at me with this awed expression on his face.

I looked down, then looked up through my lashes at him. "What?"

He said nothing, just stared at me as if I was something extraordinary, something beautiful. He reached up and brushed the hair from my forehead.

"You know, I wrote words to your lullaby." I perked up.

"Really?" He nodded. "Would you like to hear it?" I nodded vigorously. He took my hand and led me out of my room and down the staircase to the big Grade piano that sat beside our dining room. He sat down on the piano bench and I sat beside him. Then, he slowly moved his fingers across the keys.

"_The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting  
Could it be that we have been this way before  
I know you don't think that I am trying  
I know you're wearing thin down to the core." _

He sang, his voice the most beautiful thing I'd ever heard.

_"But hold your breath  
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find  
You're impossible to find_

This is not what I intended  
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart  
You always thought that I was stronger  
I may have failed  
But I have loved you from the start  
Ooohhhh."

This time I opened my mouth and sang with him, our voices blending together harmoniously. He looked at me, first with surprise then, with pleasure.__

"But hold your breath  
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find  
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep  
Breathe me in  
I'm yours to keep  
And hold onto your words  
'Cause talk is cheap  
And remember me tonight  
When you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find  
You're impossible to find."

When the last notes faded I closed my eyes tightly, a tear slowly leaking out, trailing down my cheek in a silver trail. Edward gasped quietly then reached out and touched my cheek, his hand shaking ever so slightly.

I opened my eyes to look at his. "That's another thing," I whispered. "I'm able to express my sorrow as no other vampire can. But this, Edward," I said pointing to my tears, "is not sorrow. This is happiness. You make me so happy." I leaned forward and kissed him gently. And he kissed me back, his hands cradling my head so softly, as if he still believed me to be a dream. A hallucination.

He pulled back, and voiced my very thoughts. "Tell me this isn't a dream, tell me this is real. Because if it isn't, I will surely die."

"It's real," I whispered just as quietly. "And I'm here." I stroked his cheek and we held on to each other. Just taking it all in.


	14. Scarred For Life

Bella

We both jumped a foot in the air when our peace was interrupted by an ear splitting scream.

"Aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!"

It emanated from the top of the stairs, by Vienna. We made it half way up the stairs before we saw Vienna standing in the door way of her and Vincent's room.

"My eye's!" she yelled. Covering her face with her hands and stumbling back wards. When Edward and I peered into the room we saw a very flustered Camden and a very embarrassed Albany hastily putting on certain items of clothing. I squeaked like a mouse and whipped around, burying my face in Edward's chest. Edward on the other hand, was rather enjoying our discomfort, laughing as quietly as he could. I pulled back and stared up at him, my glare fierce.

"Sorry, but (chuckle) you have to (chuckle) it's really (chuckle, chuckle) funny."

I shook my head. "You wouldn't be laughing if this was Esme and Carlisle." slowly his laughter faded, his face growing blanker and blanker until he was down right grimacing.

"You're right, I'm sorry." I lifted a shoulder and smiled at him. "I forgive you." Then we both turned to watch in amusement as the whole household, including the rest of the Cullen's, watched Vienna and Vincent scold their parents. Then we watched Vienna burn the sheets, the mattresses, and scrub the floors.

Edward was right, it _was_ kind of amusing. But I knew not to laugh or smile around Vienna, knowing she would always have some way to extract revenge.

Holding Edward's hand I tugged him toward the dark hallway. Nobody went in here but me. He frowned at me but I just shook my head. Now was not the time for words. I opened the door and led him in, arranging him right in the middle of the room. Even with our vampire vision you could only see the shadows on the wall faintly.

I flipped the light switched and watched as Edward's eyes widened in awe. "This," I said, "is my studio. Where I keep all my paintings."

I walked over to him, lacing my fingers with his, I tugged him toward the left wall. I saw his face spasm in pain, but I knew I had to show him.

"These painting are from when I was first turned." I saw Edward's sad eyes trail over each painting, I saw him turn toward the other two walls to see the same things in my paintings. People were on fire, screaming in agony in the very first paintings I created. Then it gradually got more graphic, blood staining the grounds and a face, a face with blood over it's mouth and face. My face. He turned horrified eye's to mine and was about to apologize again, but that was not what I wanted.

I covered his mouth with my hand and led him over to the fourth wall. "Look." I said quietly and he did.

"They're so much more . . ."

"Happier."

"Yes," he nodded, "happier."

Then I got close to him, clasping his hand, "I started painting these when I knew I would see you again."

He sucked in a sharp breath, pulling me towards him, but I resisted, there was still one more thing I wanted him to see.

Going to the back room I brought out the painting of him I had hid under my bed the day before.

I don't think he was even breathing. I held it face first to my chest, now shy. "It's not very good, just from memory, but-." He cut me off with a kiss. Picking up the portrait from my hands. He studied it for a moment, and then his face broke into a grin so big, I expected his face to crack.

He crushed me to him, kissing me with a passion. He pulled back, smiling softly. "You still loved me." He said in a satisfied voiced, and I swatted him on the shoulder.

"Yep. You're a difficult person to forget." I said sarcastically, and he looked at me in baffled hurt. I was instantly contrite. "Hey," I said, kissing him softly. "Want to go back to bed?" I offered with raised eyebrows, and he nodded, eagerly trailing after me.

_**Should I do a lemon in the next chapter?**_


	15. Together for The First Time

Bella

I led Edward back into my room. He lay down first on the golden coverlet, and suddenly I was shy. "So, uh, what do you want to do?" I asked.

I trailed around my room pointing out different things. "I have board games, video games, a flat screen TV," I pointed to the wooden cupboard. My hands fluttered in front of me, wringing together. I heard a rustle of the covers and not to subtly, Edward laid his hand upon mine. My eyes were glued to the floor, suddenly finding the pattern in the wood the most interesting thing in the world. A gentle finger lifted my chin but I stubborn stared at the wall out of the corner of my eye.

"Bella . . ." his gentle voice sounded. I refused to look up.

His hand tugged but I stubbornly yanked my face from his hold and staring at the floor again. "Bella." He said now, light amusement covering his tone.

I looked at him reluctantly, a small part in my brain shouting 'yay!' when I saw the slight smile on his lips. But then it disappeared, replaced by a melancholy that my heart just a tiny bit. "Do I frighten you, Isabella?"

I shivered at the use of my full name upon his tongue. I looked into his eyes, so caring and gentle, and still blanched at the thought of anyone being scared of such a man. "No." I whispered, purposely bathing his face in my sweet breath. He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. Then he looked at me again.

"Then tell me, why do you run from me?"

I smiled lightly. "I didn't run, I paced." He face didn't changed

I sighed, turning my head and laying it on his shoulder, wanting to crawl inside him. "It's not . . . that. It's just . . . I'm afraid . . . of myself. That I won't be good, that you won't want me."

His chest started to shake beneath me and it took me a while to realize that he was laughing. _At me._ I pulled away from him stung, but he grasped my hand and tugged me back to his embrace and I somewhat reluctantly returned to his warm hold, no longer cold to me. He stroked my hair tenderly. "Believe me, I want you." He said huskily and his hands slid down my body to my hips pulling them tight against his own. My head jerked up in shock, eyes wide, to what I was feeling against me and I saw him smiling in a way I'd never seen before. His smile was lazy, his eyes heavy lidded and his stare intense.

He lowered his head, brushing his lips against my own and they tingled in response. "You could never disappoint me." He whispered against my lips right before he plunged me into a whirlwind of sensations. His thumb stroked the hollow of my throat, his hands cradling my cheeks, and his lips moved against mine, just the right feel between wet and dry. His lips, I noticed, were soft, an amazing comparison against his hard body. I couldn't stop the soft mewl that bubbled up in my throat. That seemed to make something snap in Edward, because suddenly he jerked me against him with a muffled groan. His hands were no longer soft and reverent holding my face, but now moving somewhat jerkily along my body, and leaving in there wake a burning trail of fire.

Then he started to back up slowly trailing us toward the bed. My hands twined in his hair, my head tilting to the side, attempting to get a better angle. I answered the low mating sounds emanating from his chest with my own sounds of want – primal, untamed want.

The warm, damp, velvety-rough feel of his tongue was a new and curious feeling for me when he entered it into my mouth as he had done earlier that day and it's searching thrusts elicited thrilling sensations throughout her body. My brow puckered in confusion at the new feeling in my breasts, a sort of heavy ache. They paused to breather though they didn't need, then they fell on each other again. Having had that first taste, they were hungrier than ever, and they ate at each others mouths.

Edward was the aggressor but I was more than compliant. Edward knew no restriction, his mouth twisted over hers repeatedly, and soon kissing wasn't enough. His hands, so large in comparison to mine, slid down my back then to my hips jerking me against him and grinding against me in a most un-Edward-like way.

"I want you," he growled as his mouth traced a fiery trail of fire down the column of my neck. "Uuggghhhh," was my oh-so-intelligent response. The sensations washing through me were unlike any other and I let my head fall back limply in compliance as Edward ran his mouth along my collarbone, licking at my skin and muffling a moan against my heaving chest. He looked up at me, his hair flopping over his eyes boyishly, though the look in his eyes was everything but boyish. He brought his head up again kissing a path along my cheek to my ear. I whimpered at the loss of suction so close to where I wanted it, needed it.

Edward's breath brushed against my ear as he spoke. "Do you believe it? Do you believe I want you?" "Yes," I nearly sobbed, "please!"

"Please, what?" he whispered. I was shaking with the force of my need, desperate. He moved closer, no longer touching me with his hands and I silently mourned the loss of them. I stared at him, helpless in his gaze, not at all knowing what I wanted.

Edward

She stared at me with her bright eyes half wild and her rosebud lips damp and parted. It was all I could do not to hump her leg like a randy dog. She stared at me, her perfect brow puckered, as if confused by my question, as if she didn't know what she wanted.

_Well, she was quite a solemn girl, maybe she didn't quite think of these things in quite as much detail as the boys in our school had,_ my mind reasoned. As she trembled in my arms, looking up at me with her wide doe eyes, I felt a thrill run through me. It couldn't be described as anything other than pure male satisfaction. And pride. And possession. He would be her first and only lover and her, his.

He felt his own face soften as he stared at her tenderly her back still arched back across his arm, her breasts presented in front of him. He bent his head, watching from beneath the fringe of his eyelashes, and nuzzled the slope of her breast, she gasped and her eyes slid closed a soft panting sound escaping from her parted lips.

Bella

I vaguely realized my shirt was being removed, and when I opened my heavy lids I saw Edward's awe filled gazed zeroed in on my chest. I realized belatedly that if he was doing that and I was doing this, then who was tending the shop? I didn't care. I loved him and he loved me. We moved in tandem, removing each others clothing slowly and reverently. We kissed and touched and stroked till the fever could no longer be contained.

Then we were together in a way we'd never been before.


End file.
